And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
There r osticjed everywhere
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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