I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
worst night to have a conscience
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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