dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
