Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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