ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
