pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
