so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
