I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
