I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I don't think brook has ever known best
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
