I wannas sexs uuuuu
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize