Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize