he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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