at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
