At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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