he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Randomize
