I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I'm too high and old for this...
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