He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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