whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
