he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
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