1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
