He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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