Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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