I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
