She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
