I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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