I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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