Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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