He is an equal opportunity slut.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize