when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Then you guys just all showered together...?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
