Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
