no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Randomize
