I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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