Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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