just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize