He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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