I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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