i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
