is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
