I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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