I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize