I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
