We won't sleep together?
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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