But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
