But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize
