Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
