i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
