I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
