i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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