Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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