Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Randomize
